Sizzling August...
YIKES!!

Sunday, August 1st, was my daughter Carrie's birthday- she turned 22. God, how time flies- just when did the space-time continuum change?? Carrie met me in Everett and allowed me to buy her a steak dinner, with yummy dessert. She has not been happy with me and all the changes in her family that I have wrought over the last two years, but she tries to put up with my presence periodically. I am glad she met with me to celebrate her birth.

Carrie graduated from Evergreen College last year and has been working at Target- recently getting another promotion. She is a good worker, they appreciate her too.

Two years ago I wrote a bit about her 20th birthday, it seemed good so I repeat it here again:

This is my daughter, Carrie Ann. She turned 20 today, August 1st, 2002. She was born in the wee hours of the morning, on a Sunday at the University Hospital in Ann Arbor, Michigan. I lost 3 pregnancies before she was born- I wanted her very much and I was glad she came that day, I am glad that she is my daughter and chose me to be her mother.

Carrie was a "colicky" baby, and that was hard. But she is a trooper; she has endured many things- including having me for a mom. Carrie was named after my grandmother's mother- I do not remember her. Her middle name is the same as mine, and the same as my mother's, and the same as my grandmother's, and the same as my great-grandmother's. Carrie is an old soul.

Carrie goes to Evergreen State College in Olympia- the "Hippie School". It is a good school for her, I am glad she chose to go there. She is studying environmental sciences- she is passionate about those things. But she really is a writer and she, too, has her own web site and writes much more creatively than me. Carrie is less emotional and more measured than her mother, yet she lives by her heart- she is here for a reason and she will find it in this world.

Carrie giggles a lot- she loves to feel the laughter inside of her self. She is courageous and follows what her heart tells her is her path, even if it is something outside of the norm. She is very creative and started many stories, screen plays and books while still young. One of her books had quotes from people, songs, sayings at the beginning of each chapter and those quotes were meaningful, thoughtful, profound- she made all of them up herself. She is an old soul. She has much to draw upon, and she will learn to draw upon and connect to more than she knows- I know wisdom will be hers.

Love, MOM

I have a history of pre-cancerous polyps and therefore have a colonoscopy once in a while to keep track of things down there. I had my fourth one in 10 years last Friday- not my favorite thing to do, with the "prep" the day before the procedure being the worst part.

After it was over the doctor came to give me his pronouncement of a "clean" bill of health and pictures of my insides. Given his positive assessment I was surprised to see so much skating around inside of me...


"When it comes to humility, I'm the greatest."- Bullwinkle Moose

This week NPR made me aware of a photographer that Jay was already familiar with, Henri Cartier-Bresson. Henri died earlier this week; he became famous for his portraits and the way that he could capture meaning in a fleeting image. Henri primarily made photographs from the 1930s on into the 1970s.

These two images link to sites with his photos- check them out, they are very good, existential.

"Photography can reach eternity through the moment."- Henri Cartier-Bresson

8/10/04: Lovely antique ring, very sweet setting, circa 1930's.

Jay gave me this ring this evening- I like it a very lot.

Jay's mother died a few years ago, she was born October 17, 1930. My mother was born October 17, 1931. We are planning to take the train to Michigan this fall and get married in my mother's home October 17th. Life is good.

A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust.~ Nanette Newman

I recently met a man heading into his late 80s. He was originally from Norway, and I wasn't clear on how he made it to the US, but he told me he had been in the US Army and fought "in the war". He had been a dance instructor, and a merchant marine- "I've been around the world twice, been through all of the canals." He loved to ballroom dance and loved to paint little figures depicting soldiers and other military things- neither of these could he do anymore.

He talked about using his hundreds of war figurines to re-enact big battles, such as Waterloo, studying different strategies to see how Napoleon could have fared better. I told him that I am currently reading a large volume about Teddy Roosevelt that had won a Pulitzer- he liked that.

He had blue eyes that danced, and he clearly enjoyed having a woman sitting with him on the edge of his bed. He was also kind enough to share with me what he had discovered about life and its meaning: "Life is a joke." I looked at him, most likely looking somewhat surprised at this summation. "Life is a joke. You are born, you live, you die. Someone is having a good laugh at our expense." He smiled and asked when I would be back. I told him I come around about every 15 months. "Oh." I guess he wasn't sure if he woud be there the next time I came.


"I'd like to get away from earth awhile and then come back to it and begin again."- Robert Frost

Well, way back in the spring of 2001 my long-time friend Craig, who worked with me in the later 1970s at Ypsilanti State Hospital, called to say that he had been diagnosed with esophageal cancer and given a prognosis of a less than 20% chance of being alive in six months even with treatment. He had finally quit working at the hospital a year and a half before and start taking computer classes at the community college, enjoying web page making. Craig said that they had been some of the best months of his life, making the blow of his diagnosis more bitter.

Craig and I e-mailed and talked on the telephone a lot for the next six months, and he got me interested in and encouraged me to pursue personal web page making. I ended up taking two community college classes myself so that I could write and understand html. The medium became a wonderful creative and expressive outlet for me during my journey that his news that spring sent me on. Since then I have left a marriage of 22 years, gotten divorced, alienated my children by my actions, and begun a new relationship that will soon venture into marriage.

Craig died this last April, and I am not sure that he ever knew how powerful his call that spring was for me. Life is weird, death is weird. I did not have a lot of interaction with Craig the last year and a half of his life, yet, still it is astounding to comprehend that he is no longer here. I am sure that I am not the first to feel this way about someone lost to this world. If you click on Craig's picture it will take you to all I have left of my very first page- it is three pictures of it scanned and made into a web page.

"What I do today is important because I am exchanging a day of my life for it."- Hugh Mulligan

Deb Appelman turned 50 earlier in August and last weekend three of us took her out to eat in celebration. Pat, Robie and I took her out for "all you can eat" (a lot) at a Chinese buffet recommended by Robie- good choice. It was yummy and, a given, we pigged out.

A good time was had by all, and it was fun to see everyone that I now rarely see living and working "up north". Festivity pictures can be seen by clicking on my buddies' picture above.

"Those who are mentally and emotionally healthy are those who have learned when to say yes, when to say no, and when to say whoopee!"- Willard S. Krabill

My cousin, Mike Jardot, is a math teacher in Ohio. He and his wife, Donna, went on a cruise this summer that they enjoyed immensely. They wrote a review about their adventures and it was chosen to be posted on a cruise site- you can read it by clicking on the picture of the cruise ship.

Mike's students love him and one of them made a video about him titled SuperJardot- you can view it by clicking on Mike's picture at the left if you have DSL or cable (it's pretty cool). If you have dial-up click here: http://www.kentoncityschools.org/khs/art/superjardot.html.

"I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see."- John Burroughs

Today, August 25th, is the 50th birthday of Elvis Costello. Whew! I am glad I turned 50 last year, this year seems to be getting crowded.

Craig did a couple of covers of Costello songs that I enjoyed, including the one about Red Shoes and its line that caught my ear at the time: "Oh I used to be disgusted, And now I try to be amused." Jay turned me on to Costello's song called Watching the Detectives and its line "She's filing her finger nails while they're dragging the lake", so incredibly vivid.

A couple of years ago Elvis married the throaty jazz singer, Diana Krall- what a combo. I love her rendition of Joni Mitchell's "A Case of You". But I do digress... simple thoughts from the day.

Leviticus: 25 on the Mosaic institution of Jubilee: "Consecrate the fiftieth year and proclaim liberty throughout the land. It shall be a jubilee for you; each of you is to return to his family property and each to his own clan."

I have been immersed in the life of Theodore Roosevelt for a few weeks now. I have been reading The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt by Edmund Morris, which won the Pullitzer Prize- it is 782 pages of not-large type (I have already renewed this library book and it is due again tomorrow although, alas, I am only on page 330. I will either have to renew it again, if allowed, or check it out again, or buy it.).

Teddy was a fascinating fellow, extremely intelligent and equally energetic and driven. He devoured books and information, wrote prolificly and his physical activity impressed the cowboys roaming the Dakotas in the late 1800s. It is interesting to read about him and interesting to learn about politics and life a hundred years ago. The politics sound very familiar, with business interests getting the ear of politicians and trying to drive public policy. The author inserts his opinion: "The alliance between government and malt, in the late nineteenth century, was as unbreakable as that between government and oil in the late twentieth." page 220

The societal norms are also interesting- despite being an avid naturalist and outdoorsman, Thedore loved to hunt and would literally kill tens of animals in a single day. He had strong ideas about morality, sex and race relations- the latter being quite enlightened, stating that he could not envision how a country founded upon notions of equality could have meant that equality to belong to only a portion of its inhabitants. On his first outing to the Badlands in his 20s he left a mark on one fifteen year old who spent nights listening to Teddy talk with his dad: "It was listening to these talks after supper, in the old shack on the Cannonball, that I first came to understand that the Lord made the earth for all of us, and not for the chosen few." page 204

At any rate, an interesting read. Oh, by the way, this book is only the first part of Mr. Roosevelt's life, up until he becomes Vice President. Years later Mr. Morris wrote the rest of the story, called Theodore Rex, and I am also ingesting that- by CD. It is a 20 CD set, and I am currently on CD number 12 (having renewed the set from the library once, but I am confident I will have it finished by the time it is due again...). Theodore is a fascinating fellow.


"It is the greatest of all mistakes to do nothing because you can only do a little. Do what you can."- Sydney Smith

The historic 2nd Street bridge in Mount Vernon goes over I-5 and has been problematic for decades because it has the lowest clearance of any bridge on I-5, occassionally catching an unwary truck driver. It is being torn down and replaced with something modern, and likely safer, but with less personality.

So, I had to go get one last picture of it before it was gone and could only say "gee, I should have gotten a picture". Jay and I walked up and down it, to say that we had, a couple of weeks ago, so I guess we've got that piece of history covered.

In honor of the picture-taking occassion, the city or county or whoever just repainted the yellow line down the middle of it... yes, it is true. So much for efficiency in government. C'est la vie.

This trip to the bridge, just after our weekly library outing, Jay stayed in the truck whilst I did my picturing... :)

and caught a sight or two of him in the process.




. . . that is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way.- Doris Lessing

In honor of my recent colonoscopy success, Mary Bradley submitted the following:

A physician claims these are actual comments made by patients while he was performing colonoscopies:
1. "Take it easy, Doc! You're boldly going where no man has gone before!"
2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
3. "Can you hear me NOW?!!"
4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"
5. "You know, in Arkansas....we're now legally married."
6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"
7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out....you do the Hokey Pokey....and yeeow!"
8. "Now I know how a Muppet feels!"
9. "Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not, in fact, up there?"

I forgot to put a bit on about a concert Jay and I went to August 19th- a blast from the past, we went to see the Doobie Brothers play in Lynden, at the county fair. I was not at all sure what we were in for, if the band was a bunch of old guys trying to be young, or burnt out, or what. As it turned out they were sharp and put out a great sound.

Lynden is a very conservative town and so the crowd was fun to watch- they seemed to enjoy "Jesus is Just Alright With Me", standing up to clap and sway. The band was huge, with three drummers and drum sets, one keyboard, one horn and three guitars- the guitar work was excellent. Near the end they brought out their families, kids and all. Nice touch.

Two of the guitar players did an accoustic number that was sweet, but the cool thing was that when they were done, they reached over and hugged each other, revelling in each other's musical accompishments. There certainly is an ability that comes with age to finally be able to truly enjoy and celebrate others' talents and presence. Cool, man.

"When will we become lovable? When will we feel safe? When will we get all the protection, nurturing, and love we so richly deserve? We will get it when we begin giving it to ourselves."- Beyond Codependency

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Sound: Click on the Lips Featuring: Bullwinkle "Presto!" Page Created August 2004

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